25 September, 2011

Sometimes I speak Spanish to the cats

The roommate’s cat doesn’t even know his own name, so it’s not like it makes a difference to him when I follow him saying “Tu me caes mal! Tu me caes mal!”

My cat is smart enough, though. In my pre-roommate days, I spoke Spanish to her all the time. That’s how she got her name.  I’d say “hola gatita mia!” and then when the vet asked me what her name is, the only other thing I’d been calling her was “little shit” and Mia just sounded better. 


11 August, 2011

Romance at 14

His head was shaved, he wore an Eminem t-shirt and he showed up to 1st period gym class high every day. 

I had a huge crush on him, and somehow he decided to have one on me too.

That summer, we talked on the phone all night, practically every night. I saved the Instant Message conversations and laughed when he changed the words to SmashMouth’s “All Star.”  

Once, I visited when he was at work at Chuck E. Cheese. He came to say hi and had something for me in both of his hands.  In the left, bunches of free tokens. In the right, a sterling silver heart on a chain, from Piercing Pagoda. 

We never actually dated. We still talk on occasion, but I have to say, he was much more interesting at 14 than he is at 27. 

8 August, 2011

I could have been popular

I was new to my school in 9th grade. A few weeks into the school year, I was hanging out in the cafeteria after school with the one friend I had made, waiting for my dad to pick me up. I decided to get a snack, and left my friend to check out the vending machines. 

As I was standing there, this dude appeared out of nowhere and started talking to me. 



"Are you new?"


"What grade are you in?"


"Me too. Do you have a boyfriend?"


"Can I be your boyfriend?"


Then he just gave me this weird surprised look walked away back to his friends, who I assumed had dared him to do that as a joke and to make fun of me. The weird part is, he never once made eye contact with me again the rest of High School, like, on purpose. 

I found out after the fact that he was “popular.”  Think how different my life could have been!  I would have probably made friends with the dance team and been in on that whole dye the top of your head blonde and the hair underneath black craze, and whatever else “popular” kids did in High School from 1998 to 2002. OR I could have been that homely girl that the “popular” girls gave a makeover to and my popularity becomes more than theirs, launching me to the uppermost echelons of High School society. 

I don’t actually reminisce and say to myself “what if…” about that dude. I just remembered this story the other day, and can’t even look him up because I don’t remember his name.